








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 147 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2931 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,921 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4184 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3438 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1975 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3324 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $448,681 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snowrowdy | 83% | 18 |
| #2 | seb-a-licious | 81% | 32 |
| #3 | nguyen | 74% | 57 |
| #4 | Bunny | 70% | 76 |
| #5 | Mitchin | 68% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | fluff | 60% | 20 |
| #9 | . | 56% | 93 |
| #10 | wiynne | 55% | 33 |
| #11 | pear * | 54% | 133 |
| #12 | nuBnuB | 54% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pear * | 13 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Bunny | 13 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Champ | 12 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | nguyen | 11 | 0.0101 |
| #5 | seb-a-licious | 9 | 0.0133 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pear * | 766 | 0.27 | 20 min |
| #2 | . | 329 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #3 | nuBnuB | 326 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #4 | Champ | 294 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | Bunny | 280 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seb-a-licious | +4.34 | 86 | 75 |
| #2 | Bunny | +3.60 | 79 | 61 |
| #3 | Champ | +3.16 | 87 | 60 |
| #4 | snowrowdy | +1.75 | 82 | 62 |
| #5 | pear * | +1.21 | 78 | 69 |





