








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 382 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
742 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,691 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 930 | 25% |
| Smokes | 845 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1082 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 834 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $636,817 of utility $271 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 145 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | PlofTank | 54% | 54 |
| #8 | Sem180 | 50% | 6 |
| #9 | Beek | 50% | 8 |
| #10 | sejecem | 45% | 29 |
| #11 | Enviii. | 42% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yo_ViDa | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | PlofTank | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | jelle023 | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | maddoxx | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | Enviii. | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yo_ViDa | 455 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #2 | jelle023 | 197 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #3 | ZypX | 150 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #4 | PlofTank | 114 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | maddoxx | 95 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yo_ViDa | +3.24 | 84 | 88 |
| #2 | jelle023 | +3.15 | 76 | 73 |
| #3 | ZypX | +1.70 | 81 | 66 |
| #4 | PlofTank | +1.59 | 61 | 61 |
| #5 | maddoxx | +1.32 | 81 | 73 |





