








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 49 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 122 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1495 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,396 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1570 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1422 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1127 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1277 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $405,724 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 67 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ぷ ๖BullDog! | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | Mifu | 60% | 91 |
| #3 | Discount Snaski, | 55% | 42 |
| #4 | Nixxo | 53% | 118 |
| #5 | HoMieS | 51% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Discount Snaski, | 55% | 42 |
| #4 | Nixxo | 53% | 118 |
| #5 | HoMieS | 51% | 53 |
| #6 | LegendenCSGO | 49% | 74 |
| #7 | Zejeo | 48% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nixxo | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #2 | Zejeo | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | HoMieS | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nixxo | 425 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #2 | Mifu | 276 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | Zejeo | 203 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | ぷ ๖BullDog! | 122 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #5 | LegendenCSGO | 114 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wizard Without Hat | +1.12 | 78 | 75 |
| #2 | ぷ ๖BullDog! | +0.89 | 55 | 73 |
| #3 | Nixxo | +0.86 | 59 | 76 |
| #4 | Mifu | -0.24 | 63 | 80 |
| #5 | LegendenCSGO | -1.10 | 60 | 65 |





