








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 309 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 129 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1533 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,081 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2628 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2693 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1614 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2146 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $394,938 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RichSwitch | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | mae/hc | 67% | 21 |
| #3 | MERC | 65% | 103 |
| #4 | π
Ίπ
°ππ
Όπ
° | 63% | 152 |
| #5 | frang | 62% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | π
Ίπ
°ππ
Όπ
° | 63% | 152 |
| #5 | frang | 62% | 117 |
| #6 | stefan bellof | 59% | 151 |
| #7 | Fediir | 58% | 19 |
| #8 | tang | 44% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frang | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | MERC | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | stefan bellof | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #4 | π
Ίπ
°ππ
Όπ
° | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π
Ίπ
°ππ
Όπ
° | 593 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #2 | stefan bellof | 321 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | frang | 250 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | MERC | 203 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | tang | 139 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mae/hc | +1.87 | 75 | 59 |
| #2 | π
Ίπ
°ππ
Όπ
° | +1.86 | 78 | 79 |
| #3 | frang | +1.81 | 83 | 67 |
| #4 | Fediir | +1.24 | 84 | 57 |
| #5 | MERC | +1.05 | 81 | 65 |





