








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 134 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1409 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,548 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1607 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1164 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1969 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1808 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $506,019 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 420 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lahaine | 59% | 66 |
| #2 | PitrU_PunisheR | 52% | 128 |
| #3 | Martin | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | select | 50% | 66 |
| #5 | Dom | 49% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Martin | 50% | 34 |
| #4 | select | 50% | 66 |
| #5 | Dom | 49% | 108 |
| #6 | dRe | 48% | 120 |
| #7 | Menty | 46% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PitrU_PunisheR | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | dRe | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | select | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Dom | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Menty | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dRe | 538 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #2 | select | 399 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #3 | Menty | 290 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #4 | PitrU_PunisheR | 255 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | Dom | 219 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Martin | +2.11 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | dRe | +1.29 | 75 | 75 |
| #3 | Lahaine | +0.93 | 73 | 73 |
| #4 | PitrU_PunisheR | +0.85 | 54 | 72 |
| #5 | select | +0.37 | 56 | 76 |





