








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 570 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 356 matches | ||
| Faceit | 174 matches | ||
| Renown | 28 matches | ||
| Esplay | 27 matches | 2,013 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6558 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,077 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2187 | 16% |
| Smokes | 6340 | 45% |
| HE Grenades | 4049 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1501 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,604,335 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 337 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | howl | 70% | 53 |
| #2 | SULL_ | 69% | 42 |
| #3 | gaz.g | 63% | 224 |
| #4 | LolograМ | 61% | 61 |
| #5 | ouibri | 60% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abom | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | gaz.g | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | ouibri | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | MouldyLunchBox | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Caylon | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gaz.g | 687 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | abom | 536 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #3 | Caylon | 250 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | howl | 229 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #5 | LolograМ | 227 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 52 | +3.67 | 83 | 54 |
| #2 | howl | +3.33 | 79 | 81 |
| #3 | LolograМ | +1.88 | 87 | 65 |
| #4 | SULL_ | +0.55 | 62 | 75 |
| #5 | abom | +0.32 | 65 | 74 |





