








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 409 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 129 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Renown | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2942 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,738 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6393 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4931 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4997 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4417 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $475,124 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 402 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dexterity | 59% | 34 |
| #2 | gaz.g | 57% | 40 |
| #3 | Fluffy | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | #Kingy | 55% | 56 |
| #5 | Wardy | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | MouldyLunchBox | 46% | 116 |
| #15 | 52 | 45% | 53 |
| #16 | Caylon | 45% | 42 |
| #17 | LOST | 44% | 103 |
| #18 | M i n c h e r z | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | howl | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | abom | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | MouldyLunchBox | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | LOST | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | gaz.g | 4 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | howl | 539 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #2 | abom | 318 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | MouldyLunchBox | 270 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | LOST | 236 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | ky1e | 229 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 52 | +3.84 | 78 | 54 |
| #2 | howl | +3.55 | 78 | 76 |
| #3 | abom | +1.40 | 66 | 70 |
| #4 | M i n c h e r z | +0.63 | 88 | 62 |
| #5 | c0n | +0.45 | 86 | 67 |





