








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 72 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1073 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,091 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1722 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1288 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1048 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1033 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $195,412 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ボムビー | 78% | 27 |
| #2 | Bobzy Malone | 77% | 22 |
| #3 | KAOi// | 76% | 17 |
| #4 | Sound | 75% | 8 |
| #5 | 1738 | 69% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | animal abuser | 50% | 8 |
| #15 | handikappensorg | 50% | 10 |
| #16 | Sun Tzu said Ohio is based | 50% | 10 |
| #17 | phox | 50% | 14 |
| #18 | S v e n | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bobzy Malone | 6 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | ボムビー | 5 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Miju | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | KAOi// | 3 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | ams | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ボムビー | 175 | 0.30 | 5 min |
| #2 | calu | 126 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | ams | 116 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Tijs | 108 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #5 | Miju | 93 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | animal abuser | +4.12 | 91 | 77 |
| #2 | ボムビー | +3.33 | 81 | 68 |
| #3 | Tijs | +2.50 | 83 | 69 |
| #4 | phox | +1.92 | 94 | 72 |
| #5 | calu | +1.92 | 86 | 59 |





