








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 363 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 129 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2391 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,675 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3019 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1630 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2333 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1693 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $812,434 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 234 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | www.csgoroll.com/r/DRUCKEBERGER | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Night | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | missjasmin | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | fenris | 54% | 121 |
| #5 | maqueenya♛ | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ✪ KOLLY | 51% | 80 |
| #7 | N O R D Q V 1 S T | 50% | 103 |
| #8 | SynteC_ | 48% | 25 |
| #9 | SirDennis | 46% | 41 |
| #10 | flx | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fenris | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | SirDennis | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | ✪ KOLLY | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | maqueenya♛ | 2 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | N O R D Q V 1 S T | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ KOLLY | 284 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | fenris | 135 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | N O R D Q V 1 S T | 132 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | SynteC_ | 84 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | missjasmin | 69 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fenris | +1.42 | 78 | 73 |
| #2 | SynteC_ | +1.34 | 86 | 59 |
| #3 | N O R D Q V 1 S T | +1.12 | 76 | 63 |
| #4 | flx | +1.00 | 72 | 77 |
| #5 | Night | +0.54 | 75 | 64 |





