








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
894 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,689 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 865 | 32% |
| Smokes | 647 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 750 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 427 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $241,594 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 90 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Griz | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | antli0n | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | canter | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | I've Been Worse | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | skyrim super fan im the best | 62% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | I've Been Worse | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | skyrim super fan im the best | 62% | 13 |
| #6 | ✪ClappyBats | 60% | 25 |
| #7 | iguana | 59% | 22 |
| #8 | Blueberry | 57% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | canter | 3 | 0.0169 |
| #2 | Blueberry | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | iguana | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Griz | 1 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blueberry | 126 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | ✪ClappyBats | 63 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | iguana | 54 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | canter | 38 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #5 | skyrim super fan im the best | 37 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | canter | +3.12 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | ✪ClappyBats | +2.85 | 89 | 74 |
| #3 | mekkiz | +1.87 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | Blueberry | +1.86 | 64 | 72 |
| #5 | Griz | +1.68 | 75 | 60 |





