








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
777 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,414 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 469 | 19% |
| Smokes | 675 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 748 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 522 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $240,422 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Limasol | 83% | 12 |
| #2 | Superkai64 | 80% | 10 |
| #3 | bid | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | Good Boy | 68% | 19 |
| #5 | dannyjf | 64% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | infopeek | 58% | 12 |
| #10 | ✪ kas | 54% | 13 |
| #11 | Fence | 50% | 8 |
| #12 | Shocki3 | 50% | 10 |
| #13 | DannyDawber98 | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jiimmy_b | 4 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | HAXTON | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Superkai64 | 2 | 0.0110 |
| #4 | Rickyisms | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | DannyDawber98 | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ kas | 77 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #2 | Rickyisms | 54 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | HAXTON | 52 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Good Boy | 43 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jiimmy_b | 39 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Superkai64 | +3.46 | 70 | 79 |
| #2 | Spider | +3.08 | 83 | 56 |
| #3 | ✪ kas | +2.25 | 75 | 81 |
| #4 | DannyDawber98 | +1.46 | 76 | 26 |
| #5 | bid | +0.53 | 89 | 81 |





