








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 186 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1676 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,554 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 213 | 8% |
| Smokes | 714 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1234 | 48% |
| Molotovs | 393 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,414,101 of utility $298 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beowulf878 | 57% | 58 |
| #2 | Severely Autistic | 48% | 23 |
| #3 | Rick Grimes | 46% | 50 |
| #4 | Baron | Reaper | 45% | 33 |
| #5 | Deadmeat | 41% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Severely Autistic | 48% | 23 |
| #3 | Rick Grimes | 46% | 50 |
| #4 | Baron | Reaper | 45% | 33 |
| #5 | Deadmeat | 41% | 73 |
| #6 | CeltiC | 37% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baron | Reaper | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Beowulf878 | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Rick Grimes | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Deadmeat | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | CeltiC | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baron | Reaper | 223 | 0.31 | 4 min |
| #2 | Beowulf878 | 222 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | Rick Grimes | 166 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | Deadmeat | 135 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | CeltiC | 80 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Severely Autistic | +3.53 | 83 | 58 |
| #2 | Rick Grimes | +2.49 | 52 | 65 |
| #3 | Baron | Reaper | +1.65 | 45 | 57 |
| #4 | CeltiC | +1.16 | 40 | 60 |
| #5 | Beowulf878 | -0.08 | 71 | 61 |





