








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1764 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,368 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2033 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1902 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1001 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1432 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $384,217 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 246 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vicuña | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | xmonkey | 79% | 28 |
| #3 | Tottii | 76% | 38 |
| #4 | FaWo | 75% | 69 |
| #5 | fidel-_- | 75% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | CHri$ | 64% | 14 |
| #13 | tama | 63% | 8 |
| #14 | REEEEEEEEEE | 56% | 9 |
| #15 | skonk | 45% | 11 |
| #16 | sekoyadanyo | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaWo | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | xmonkey | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | FataL | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaWo | 344 | 0.27 | 7 min |
| #2 | FataL | 217 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | Tottii | 140 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | xmonkey | 124 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | knoxville | 116 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xmonkey | +3.95 | 85 | 65 |
| #2 | FaWo | +3.03 | 68 | 64 |
| #3 | FataL | +2.87 | 84 | 65 |
| #4 | fidel-_- | +2.63 | 82 | 60 |
| #5 | Gr1ng9 | +2.53 | 84 | 90 |





