








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1381 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 883 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 168 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6598 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 56,687 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 24028 | 42% |
| Smokes | 14657 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 12256 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5746 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,710,543 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2050 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dreckiger Dan | 60% | 121 |
| #2 | Copium | 57% | 157 |
| #3 | FuckingFork | 57% | 92 |
| #4 | 5k\ Armmir. | 51% | 360 |
| #5 | Mush Mush | 51% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | kupii | 47% | 328 |
| #10 | ぷ HighKo ツ | 45% | 67 |
| #11 | xeNii_ | 45% | 56 |
| #12 | $kim beeble | 44% | 228 |
| #13 | λeaveN | 42% | 230 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sabu | 11 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Swarrish. | 9 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | 5k\ Armmir. | 9 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | kupii | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | icecream.... | 6 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5k\ Armmir. | 1286 | 0.16 | 33 min |
| #2 | sabu | 1170 | 0.11 | 25 min |
| #3 | Swarrish. | 1010 | 0.09 | 26 min |
| #4 | λeaveN | 801 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #5 | $kim beeble | 654 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FuckingFork | +1.82 | 84 | 72 |
| #2 | xeNii_ | +1.82 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | Mush Mush | +1.61 | 63 | 69 |
| #4 | λeaveN | +1.26 | 72 | 69 |
| #5 | kupii | +0.84 | 74 | 61 |





