








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 561 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 314 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 92 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6111 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,032 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2087 | 12% |
| Smokes | 4348 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6661 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 3936 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,540,782 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 589 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | {FGC}* skr | 50% | 237 |
| #6 | have | 49% | 302 |
| #7 | Harmless | 47% | 211 |
| #8 | ZiPPy | 46% | 223 |
| #9 | Syrion | 44% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | apples. | 21 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Karmanized | 14 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | have | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | {FGC}* skr | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | ZiPPy | 7 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Karmanized | 1176 | 0.11 | 30 min |
| #2 | apples. | 748 | 0.08 | 18 min |
| #3 | have | 468 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | ZiPPy | 313 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #5 | {FGC}* skr | 164 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eides | +1.88 | 68 | 50 |
| #2 | Karmanized | +1.08 | 36 | 67 |
| #3 | have | +0.96 | 77 | 53 |
| #4 | apples. | -0.12 | 59 | 61 |
| #5 | Lorkyloo | -0.27 | 71 | 50 |





