








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1094 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,936 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 898 | 31% |
| Smokes | 819 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 781 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 438 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $315,770 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andeeri | 81% | 16 |
| #2 | Zaca | 62% | 81 |
| #3 | ivdza. | 57% | 49 |
| #4 | Kaelay | 57% | 102 |
| #5 | Juzdabuzda | 55% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ivdza. | 57% | 49 |
| #4 | Kaelay | 57% | 102 |
| #5 | Juzdabuzda | 55% | 42 |
| #6 | Heppatyttö | 52% | 60 |
| #7 | Quendreal | 52% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kaelay | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Zaca | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Heppatyttö | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Juzdabuzda | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zaca | 179 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #2 | Quendreal | 146 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Juzdabuzda | 119 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Heppatyttö | 66 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Andeeri | 45 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quendreal | +4.40 | 68 | 56 |
| #2 | Andeeri | +4.02 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | tattz | +3.21 | 63 | 63 |
| #4 | Zaca | +2.41 | 50 | 63 |
| #5 | Juzdabuzda | +0.97 | 64 | 57 |





