








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 161 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 55 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6943 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8044 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5797 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 7457 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5167 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,382,812 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andeeri | 65% | 83 |
| #2 | tattz | 62% | 81 |
| #3 | Juzdabuzda | 56% | 89 |
| #4 | Heppatyttö | 54% | 218 |
| #5 | Kaelay | 52% | 234 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Cardee | 51% | 72 |
| #7 | ivdza. | 49% | 172 |
| #8 | Quendreal | 49% | 251 |
| #9 | Thor | 49% | 70 |
| #10 | AceTen | 46% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thor | 11 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Quendreal | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Kaelay | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | tattz | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Heppatyttö | 3 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quendreal | 528 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #2 | AceTen | 280 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | Cardee | 259 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | Juzdabuzda | 255 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | Andeeri | 254 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andeeri | +3.92 | 72 | 67 |
| #2 | tattz | +3.25 | 69 | 62 |
| #3 | Quendreal | +2.92 | 69 | 56 |
| #4 | Cardee | +1.34 | 50 | 84 |
| #5 | Thor | +1.31 | 62 | 42 |





