








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1561 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 223 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 182 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 150 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 133 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8265 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 42,487 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 19205 | 45% |
| Smokes | 10147 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 9001 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4134 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,858,866 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2784 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | roach* | 59% | 133 |
| #2 | herc | 51% | 159 |
| #3 | ayz | 48% | 496 |
| #4 | Splash | 47% | 501 |
| #5 | troubleN IYC$CUF | 43% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | herc | 51% | 159 |
| #3 | ayz | 48% | 496 |
| #4 | Splash | 47% | 501 |
| #5 | troubleN IYC$CUF | 43% | 134 |
| #6 | Bratan | 39% | 126 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ayz | 31 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Splash | 23 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | roach* | 8 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | herc | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Bratan | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ayz | 1308 | 0.14 | 35 min |
| #2 | roach* | 627 | 0.24 | 16 min |
| #3 | Splash | 413 | 0.04 | 13 min |
| #4 | troubleN IYC$CUF | 268 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | herc | 219 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | roach* | +4.11 | 82 | 71 |
| #2 | doNmartinez | +1.58 | 66 | 87 |
| #3 | ayz | +0.35 | 66 | 74 |
| #4 | troubleN IYC$CUF | -0.09 | 71 | 69 |
| #5 | herc | -0.74 | 38 | 64 |





