








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 237 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 246 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1966 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,829 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1323 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1154 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1969 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1383 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $514,056 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trill God | 58% | 57 |
| #2 | Gamsahabmida | 54% | 70 |
| #3 | jlingotsetup | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | BBBBB | 50% | 58 |
| #5 | bo some tong | 45% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Gamsahabmida | 54% | 70 |
| #3 | jlingotsetup | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | BBBBB | 50% | 58 |
| #5 | bo some tong | 45% | 55 |
| #6 | Jobu Tupaki | 43% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BBBBB | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Trill God | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Jobu Tupaki | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | jlingotsetup | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | bo some tong | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gamsahabmida | 125 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | BBBBB | 124 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | bo some tong | 114 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Trill God | 100 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Jobu Tupaki | 59 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gamsahabmida | +1.96 | 64 | 74 |
| #2 | Trill God | +1.93 | 74 | 58 |
| #3 | bo some tong | +0.44 | 66 | 59 |
| #4 | jlingotsetup | -0.39 | 47 | 41 |
| #5 | BBBBB | -0.76 | 56 | 56 |





