








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 256 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 170 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2459 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,706 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2400 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2270 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2108 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1928 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $437,424 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 552 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡𝒜𝓌𝒾♡ | 77% | 22 |
| #2 | Känni Teroliina | 73% | 15 |
| #3 | SanpaJussi | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | ✪𝑵𝒊𝒌𝒐ツ | 56% | 63 |
| #5 | LMRTX | 51% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | LMRTX | 51% | 97 |
| #6 | GeNi | 50% | 105 |
| #7 | asdasder | 49% | 59 |
| #8 | hude hundo jr | 41% | 17 |
| #9 | Rikodou | 27% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeNi | 10 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | LMRTX | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | ♡𝒜𝓌𝒾♡ | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | ✪𝑵𝒊𝒌𝒐ツ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | asdasder | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LMRTX | 441 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | GeNi | 277 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | ✪𝑵𝒊𝒌𝒐ツ | 240 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #4 | asdasder | 125 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | SanpaJussi | 40 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Känni Teroliina | +7.10 | 69 | 55 |
| #2 | ✪𝑵𝒊𝒌𝒐ツ | +1.85 | 83 | 67 |
| #3 | sexourwork | +1.48 | 86 | 63 |
| #4 | LMRTX | +0.67 | 69 | 68 |
| #5 | GeNi | +0.62 | 81 | 67 |





