








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 811 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 639 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 143 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




76 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7054 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,302 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13164 | 33% |
| Smokes | 8292 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 9884 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 7962 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $905,777 of utility $59 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2105 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Krabbedal | 40% | 72 |
| #14 | ott | 40% | 50 |
| #15 | Fowies | 39% | 51 |
| #16 | Puzzlemaster98 | 38% | 39 |
| #17 | Kvams | 36% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emil | 16 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | Krabbedal | 14 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | Princess Maja res | 14 | 0.0161 |
| #4 | Benn-Tenzz︻デ 一 | 13 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | n0rdens | 11 | 0.0079 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benn-Tenzz︻デ 一 | 350 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | 001 | 348 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | MultiNormann | 337 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | emil | 286 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | levlQuattro | 258 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Princess Maja res | +3.20 | 63 | 55 |
| #2 | n0rdens | +3.09 | 83 | 54 |
| #3 | Benn-Tenzz︻デ 一 | +1.99 | 75 | 64 |
| #4 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | +1.36 | 71 | 75 |
| #5 | GameAndLive | +0.82 | 68 | 57 |





