










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1194 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 269 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




81 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4153 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,878 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4413 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3351 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3489 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2625 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,282,277 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3317 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Nemts | 56% | 63 |
| #9 | L6ngu ッ | 53% | 106 |
| #10 | ✪zeN | 52% | 33 |
| #11 | . | 49% | 158 |
| #12 | whole lotta swag | 31% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | 40 | 0.0124 |
| #2 | KeretzZ | 10 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | L6ngu ッ | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | ✪zeN | 6 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | Nemts | 5 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ nano | 332 | 0.28 | 10 min |
| #2 | KeretzZ | 292 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | L6ngu ッ | 251 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | Nemts | 189 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | . | 171 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | +2.47 | 93 | 49 |
| #2 | ツ nano | +1.97 | 72 | 79 |
| #3 | whole lotta swag | +1.63 | 75 | 62 |
| #4 | ✪zeN | +1.33 | 60 | 74 |
| #5 | $harky | +1.23 | 49 | 68 |





