








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 452 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 321 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3536 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,371 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3845 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4152 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2904 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3470 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,186,506 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 511 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ nano | 58% | 43 |
| #2 | gre | 56% | 63 |
| #3 | 𝓜𝓪𝓽𝓸 | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | Bigtor Tennis | 50% | 108 |
| #5 | KeretzZ | 48% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 𝓜𝓪𝓽𝓸 | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | Bigtor Tennis | 50% | 108 |
| #5 | KeretzZ | 48% | 210 |
| #6 | L6ngu ッ | 48% | 23 |
| #7 | . | 47% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bigtor Tennis | 24 | 0.0110 |
| #2 | KeretzZ | 19 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | . | 10 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | gre | 8 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | ツ nano | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KeretzZ | 516 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | ツ nano | 269 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #3 | Bigtor Tennis | 225 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | gre | 207 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | . | 119 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ nano | +2.41 | 70 | 80 |
| #2 | . | +2.32 | 89 | 49 |
| #3 | gre | +1.67 | 78 | 72 |
| #4 | KeretzZ | +1.66 | 71 | 68 |
| #5 | L6ngu ッ | -0.04 | 67 | 64 |





