








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
771 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,603 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 465 | 29% |
| Smokes | 434 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 396 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 308 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $197,743 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xFueY | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | Pjuske | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Twizzton | 75% | 8 |
| #4 | Ghost | 67% | 6 |
| #5 | PookieFries | 67% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RiiZe | 4 | 0.0388 |
| #2 | Twizzton | 3 | 0.0191 |
| #3 | god of csgo | 3 | 0.0205 |
| #4 | Shato | 2 | 0.0154 |
| #5 | kDia | 2 | 0.0235 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WelpM3 | 57 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | Twizzton | 33 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | PookieFries | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | god of csgo | 18 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #5 | Pjuske | 15 | 0.14 | 0 min |





