








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 633 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Faceit | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 47 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,445 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7339 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5521 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6195 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3390 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,461,492 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 658 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shato | 83% | 41 |
| #2 | kDia | 67% | 52 |
| #3 | Poncake | 61% | 119 |
| #4 | RiiZe | 60% | 148 |
| #5 | Ceipi | 59% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | WelpM3 | 59% | 61 |
| #7 | danus | 58% | 215 |
| #8 | PookieFries | 53% | 120 |
| #9 | Pjuske | 49% | 89 |
| #10 | RaZZ♡ | 47% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kDia | 11 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | RiiZe | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | danus | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | WelpM3 | 6 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Poncake | 5 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RiiZe | 629 | 0.21 | 22 min |
| #2 | danus | 319 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | Pjuske | 210 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | WelpM3 | 196 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Ceipi | 189 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RiiZe | +5.18 | 80 | 73 |
| #2 | Twizzton | +3.42 | 74 | 66 |
| #3 | Shato | +0.45 | 58 | 37 |
| #4 | Pjuske | -0.23 | 56 | 54 |
| #5 | Poncake | -0.35 | 64 | 37 |





