








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
498 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 696 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 421 | 60% |
| Smokes | 90 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 154 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 31 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $57,559 of utility $69 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 鬼佬 games | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | 殺 entryfragger from omsk 死 | 66% | 29 |
| #3 | TEC_guy | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | aleksandar | 50% | 6 |
| #5 | tenkay | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | TEC_guy | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | aleksandar | 50% | 6 |
| #5 | tenkay | 44% | 9 |
| #6 | Daniel Larson | 38% | 8 |
| #7 | matu | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 殺 entryfragger from omsk 死 | 21 | 0.0401 |
| #2 | TEC_guy | 11 | 0.0171 |
| #3 | tenkay | 8 | 0.0473 |
| #4 | matu | 6 | 0.0504 |
| #5 | aleksandar | 5 | 0.0442 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 殺 entryfragger from omsk 死 | 79 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | aleksandar | 24 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | tenkay | 20 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #4 | Daniel Larson | 17 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #5 | TEC_guy | 2 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 鬼佬 games | +11.09 | 89 | 11 |
| #2 | 殺 entryfragger from omsk 死 | +8.95 | 94 | 52 |
| #3 | aleksandar | +6.19 | 96 | 41 |
| #4 | ТУРБО МЕГА СПИД | +5.15 | 83 | 29 |
| #5 | tenkay | +4.76 | 96 | 53 |





