








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 74 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 286 matches | ||
| Renown | 76 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2461 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,765 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1887 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2055 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1793 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2030 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,388,687 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 331 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lennox | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | Lewd Her Mirc | 47% | 53 |
| #3 | ja1mz | 46% | 384 |
| #4 | Fallout | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | Stiek :) | 41% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ja1mz | 46% | 384 |
| #4 | Fallout | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | Stiek :) | 41% | 56 |
| #6 | CrUmZ | 41% | 39 |
| #7 | Albis | 40% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ja1mz | 23 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Stiek :) | 6 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Lennox | 4 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | Lewd Her Mirc | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Fallout | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ja1mz | 668 | 0.08 | 16 min |
| #2 | Fallout | 133 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #3 | Lewd Her Mirc | 129 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Lennox | 56 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | CrUmZ | 54 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fallout | +2.27 | 60 | 63 |
| #2 | ja1mz | +1.26 | 67 | 53 |
| #3 | Lewd Her Mirc | +1.05 | 45 | 47 |
| #4 | Lennox | +0.79 | 44 | 45 |
| #5 | Albis | -0.91 | 46 | 30 |





