








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3658 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,013 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2255 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1614 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3267 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1877 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,046,731 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1164 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dying Dutchman | 24 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Uncle Ben Rice Prison Man | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Reboot | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Jeff | 5 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | kook2 | 3 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dying Dutchman | 410 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #2 | Uncle Ben Rice Prison Man | 220 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | M1Gs1 | 199 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Reboot | 174 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Hirschhag | 140 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Uncle Ben Rice Prison Man | +2.59 | 78 | 42 |
| #2 | Dying Dutchman | +1.84 | 82 | 46 |
| #3 | Khronos | +1.83 | 60 | 63 |
| #4 | kook2 | +1.58 | 64 | 54 |
| #5 | Hirschhag | +0.19 | 52 | 42 |





