








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1125 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,768 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1135 | 41% |
| Smokes | 629 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 447 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 557 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $229,302 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kev | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | laroy | 63% | 35 |
| #3 | Ryan the energetic | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | three | 57% | 14 |
| #5 | JTPC | 54% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | odinxxx91 | 10 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | ryan | 6 | 0.0090 |
| #3 | Dia-chan <3 | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | laroy | 3 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Sohai Sohai Mangki | 2 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | odinxxx91 | 298 | 0.29 | 7 min |
| #2 | JTPC | 296 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | laroy | 174 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #4 | Dia-chan <3 | 158 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | ryan | 50 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laroy | +3.31 | 81 | 58 |
| #2 | three | +2.92 | 82 | 48 |
| #3 | JTPC | +1.15 | 75 | 45 |
| #4 | odinxxx91 | +1.01 | 75 | 60 |
| #5 | Hoshi | +1.00 | 40 | 68 |





