








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 522 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4310 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,546 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3781 | 40% |
| Smokes | 1849 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2033 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1883 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,145,217 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 875 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laroy | 59% | 58 |
| #2 | three | 56% | 25 |
| #3 | Screwdriver | 55% | 33 |
| #4 | nuna | 54% | 79 |
| #5 | kev | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dia-chan <3 | 634 | 0.22 | 15 min |
| #2 | odinxxx91 | 493 | 0.32 | 12 min |
| #3 | laroy | 291 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #4 | ryan | 236 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | nuna | 229 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laroy | +3.70 | 85 | 60 |
| #2 | JTPC | +2.00 | 76 | 51 |
| #3 | three | +1.71 | 81 | 53 |
| #4 | nuna | +0.91 | 87 | 55 |
| #5 | odinxxx91 | +0.02 | 74 | 57 |





