








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 377 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 359 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3793 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,806 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2845 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3059 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1553 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2349 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $971,718 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lizzyc | 78% | 23 |
| #2 | 梵 | 70% | 56 |
| #3 | 时倾 | 53% | 119 |
| #4 | 最硬的人 | 52% | 54 |
| #5 | Ha0zi | 50% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 时倾 | 53% | 119 |
| #4 | 最硬的人 | 52% | 54 |
| #5 | Ha0zi | 50% | 56 |
| #6 | 梦想打maj0r | 50% | 113 |
| #7 | Gabriel— | 44% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 时倾 | 19 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | Gabriel— | 14 | 0.0114 |
| #3 | 梵 | 9 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | 梦想打maj0r | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | Ha0zi | 6 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 时倾 | 390 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | 梦想打maj0r | 320 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Ha0zi | 298 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #4 | 梵 | 273 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #5 | Gabriel— | 217 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lizzyc | +3.86 | 75 | 59 |
| #2 | 梵 | +3.24 | 51 | 59 |
| #3 | 最硬的人 | +1.20 | 68 | 51 |
| #4 | Gabriel— | +0.71 | 79 | 51 |
| #5 | Ha0zi | +0.55 | 64 | 63 |





