








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 153 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,767 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2026 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1839 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1078 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1824 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $651,162 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h3XPr00f | 64% | 64 |
| #2 | Enemies’ Dad | 63% | 41 |
| #3 | yzbbdxqz | 59% | 177 |
| #4 | SevvvenLi | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | sharkml | 58% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | To55boy Superior | 55% | 20 |
| #7 | JCCZ | 51% | 75 |
| #8 | Byron_F | 50% | 94 |
| #9 | sharkii | 48% | 23 |
| #10 | Peach1cken | 45% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yzbbdxqz | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | sharkml | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Byron_F | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | h3XPr00f | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | JCCZ | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sharkml | 878 | 0.27 | 25 min |
| #2 | yzbbdxqz | 582 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #3 | Byron_F | 247 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | JCCZ | 211 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #5 | h3XPr00f | 160 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sharkml | +3.20 | 81 | 69 |
| #2 | To55boy Superior | +2.78 | 90 | 22 |
| #3 | h3XPr00f | +2.67 | 70 | 69 |
| #4 | yzbbdxqz | +2.58 | 83 | 65 |
| #5 | SevvvenLi | +1.82 | 71 | 56 |





