








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1332 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,879 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1039 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1008 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 872 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 960 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $218,213 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | silvan | 100% | 9 |
| #2 | Allahu Akbar | 86% | 7 |
| #3 | Enno | 83% | 6 |
| #4 | 5ch0lli | 78% | 9 |
| #5 | ok)))))))))))))))) | 71% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Cl0utz-1337- | 50% | 6 |
| #12 | IronTony | 50% | 20 |
| #13 | ☜✪MoRo✪☞ | 45% | 11 |
| #14 | PRIXX | 40% | 10 |
| #15 | sKeLeTr0n | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✞ | 9 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | IronTony | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Yuno | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | 5ch0lli | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | ☜✪MoRo✪☞ | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IronTony | 106 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | ✞ | 81 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | 5ch0lli | 65 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | sKeLeTr0n | 63 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #5 | ☜✪MoRo✪☞ | 58 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | moin | +3.39 | 88 | 71 |
| #2 | ok)))))))))))))))) | +1.86 | 88 | 52 |
| #3 | Enno | +1.33 | 74 | 73 |
| #4 | ✞ | +1.24 | 93 | 61 |
| #5 | Yuno | +1.02 | 68 | 58 |





