










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 3 different maps



Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
61 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 57 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15 | 26% |
| Smokes | 21 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 7 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 14 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $17,352 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DEWE | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | sKOO | 43% | 7 |
| #3 | Raton Laveur | TeyKaa | 43% | 7 |
| #4 | Unitzz | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DEWE | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | sKOO | 43% | 7 |
| #3 | Raton Laveur | TeyKaa | 43% | 7 |
| #4 | Unitzz | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sKOO | 1 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Unitzz | 18 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #2 | Raton Laveur | TeyKaa | 8 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #3 | DEWE | 7 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | sKOO | 3 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeFlowZzz | +2.65 | 38 | 29 |
| #2 | Raton Laveur | TeyKaa | +1.90 | 23 | 62 |
| #3 | Unitzz | +1.62 | 45 | 58 |
| #4 | DEWE | +1.20 | 31 | 53 |
| #5 | sKOO | -3.79 | 7 | 38 |





