








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1174 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 403 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 68 matches | ||
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




96 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10623 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,260 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5640 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6230 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4612 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4778 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,220,021 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1913 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | strate | 62% | 71 |
| #2 | petro | 60% | 197 |
| #3 | Hessel | 53% | 47 |
| #4 | Patropro [KSK] | 52% | 56 |
| #5 | JALLA | 51% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | w1nted | 51% | 198 |
| #8 | Dingleberry Handpump | 50% | 176 |
| #9 | kSee | 50% | 261 |
| #10 | X4ND | 49% | 86 |
| #11 | NadavCS | 43% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dingleberry Handpump | 62 | 0.0177 |
| #2 | kSee | 35 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | NadavCS | 22 | 0.0221 |
| #4 | w1nted | 16 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | JALLA | 12 | 0.0121 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | petro | 1130 | 0.31 | 31 min |
| #2 | w1nted | 347 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #3 | kSee | 344 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | X4ND | 328 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | strate | 189 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JB | +2.35 | 80 | 49 |
| #2 | strate | +2.01 | 85 | 57 |
| #3 | petro | +1.82 | 81 | 68 |
| #4 | kSee | +1.44 | 70 | 36 |
| #5 | Hessel | +0.49 | 61 | 55 |





