








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 37 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 82 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2106 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,601 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1304 | 28% |
| Smokes | 880 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1227 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1190 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $590,751 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | JB | 62% | 71 |
| #5 | Crazy xD | 60% | 20 |
| #6 | X4ND | 57% | 115 |
| #7 | snades | 50% | 10 |
| #8 | Doctor Quanix | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JB | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | X4ND | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Crazy xD | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Gandalf | 2 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | G1vskov | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | strate | +2.43 | 85 | 56 |
| #2 | G1vskov | +1.49 | 77 | 80 |
| #3 | JB | +1.07 | 81 | 54 |
| #4 | Gandalf | +0.96 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | Doctor Quanix | +0.26 | 73 | 67 |





