








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2035 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,718 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1708 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1605 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1992 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 413 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,172,292 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 207 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syn | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | Doctore | 64% | 22 |
| #3 | Blue Partyhat | 59% | 49 |
| #4 | Gremlin | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | ♥ cherry | 52% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ cherry | 21 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | ✭𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖊✭ | 17 | 0.0207 |
| #3 | SagesDope | 8 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | ⭕⃤𝚃𝚞𝚛𝚋0 | 7 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | dames ツ | 4 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✭𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖊✭ | +5.71 | 66 | 49 |
| #2 | Blue Partyhat | +5.43 | 77 | 65 |
| #3 | lilwill^GG | +2.61 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | Gremlin | +2.22 | 54 | 59 |
| #5 | SagesDope | +0.56 | 32 | 32 |





