








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 221 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1401 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,469 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 132 | 9% |
| Smokes | 47 | 3% |
| HE Grenades | 733 | 50% |
| Molotovs | 557 | 38% |
Our logs show you have wasted $434,029 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | La1skabandit.gg | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | Petteri | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | Ebu | 55% | 75 |
| #4 | arska | 52% | 54 |
| #5 | גלגןרפטחרח כלרחט | 49% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | גלגןרפטחרח כלרחט | 49% | 39 |
| #6 | Gurggu | 47% | 92 |
| #7 | NikkeGOAT | 43% | 28 |
| #8 | Juhussi / | 41% | 22 |
| #9 | estro ukki tässä päivää | 33% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gurggu | 24 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | NikkeGOAT | 16 | 0.0268 |
| #3 | Juhussi / | 10 | 0.0212 |
| #4 | גלגןרפטחרח כלרחט | 8 | 0.0099 |
| #5 | estro ukki tässä päivää | 7 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arska | 157 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | estro ukki tässä päivää | 124 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ebu | 121 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Juhussi / | 99 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #5 | Petteri | 83 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juhussi / | +2.82 | 68 | 46 |
| #2 | estro ukki tässä päivää | +1.95 | 53 | 44 |
| #3 | Gurggu | +1.48 | 43 | 30 |
| #4 | arska | +1.48 | 56 | 68 |
| #5 | Petteri | +1.37 | 58 | 41 |





