










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 457 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 422 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4508 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,185 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3843 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2279 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2653 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2410 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,642,064 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 216 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [R4W] Eradicator | 63% | 46 |
| #2 | [R4W]Rick Dicker | 56% | 59 |
| #3 | [R4W]Bemyhorcrux | 52% | 46 |
| #4 | adpslkiyfu | 51% | 78 |
| #5 | Gr3ml1n | 48% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | [R4W]Bemyhorcrux | 52% | 46 |
| #4 | adpslkiyfu | 51% | 78 |
| #5 | Gr3ml1n | 48% | 81 |
| #6 | Cidhr | 44% | 64 |
| #7 | bork | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gr3ml1n | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | [R4W]Rick Dicker | 5 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | adpslkiyfu | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | [R4W]Bemyhorcrux | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Cidhr | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bork | 236 | 0.31 | 5 min |
| #2 | [R4W]Rick Dicker | 213 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #3 | Gr3ml1n | 203 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Cidhr | 194 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | [R4W] Eradicator | 154 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [R4W]Rick Dicker | +2.31 | 58 | 63 |
| #2 | Cidhr | +1.85 | 30 | 44 |
| #3 | [R4W]Bemyhorcrux | +1.81 | 29 | 54 |
| #4 | ddubdaniel | -0.08 | 46 | 46 |
| #5 | Gr3ml1n | -0.10 | 23 | 72 |





