








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 564 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 302 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3989 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,369 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3335 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3356 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4891 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 2787 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,144,120 of utility $215 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OTTO | 62% | 60 |
| #2 | donpollo2982 | 59% | 108 |
| #3 | Jussi | 57% | 47 |
| #4 | Paul "The Fox" Evans | 51% | 69 |
| #5 | vepe (FIN) | 50% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Paul "The Fox" Evans | 51% | 69 |
| #5 | vepe (FIN) | 50% | 30 |
| #6 | Moo Moo🐄 | 44% | 62 |
| #7 | yegor.vadim b0$$ | 40% | 72 |
| #8 | ykkosvaantaja | 40% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | donpollo2982 | 27 | 0.0131 |
| #2 | yegor.vadim b0$$ | 13 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | Paul "The Fox" Evans | 8 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | ykkosvaantaja | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | OTTO | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yegor.vadim b0$$ | 303 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | Paul "The Fox" Evans | 274 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #3 | donpollo2982 | 256 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | ykkosvaantaja | 250 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | OTTO | 60 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vepe (FIN) | +3.54 | 84 | 61 |
| #2 | donpollo2982 | +2.46 | 83 | 72 |
| #3 | Paul "The Fox" Evans | +1.21 | 76 | 68 |
| #4 | OTTO | +1.13 | 78 | 52 |
| #5 | ykkosvaantaja | -0.10 | 75 | 51 |





