








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7070 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,756 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8107 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6351 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 6778 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5520 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,092,224 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3254 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Akaza | 9 9 9 | 66% | 53 |
| #2 | Jussi | 62% | 42 |
| #3 | OTTO | 59% | 145 |
| #4 | 冰淇淋 | 56% | 54 |
| #5 | hovinen | 55% | 229 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ykkosvaantaja | 51 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Akaza | 9 9 9 | 14 | 0.0132 |
| #3 | OTTO | 11 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Gain Eager | 9 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Abelsiini | 8 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ykkosvaantaja | 885 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #2 | hovinen | 522 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #3 | 冰淇淋 | 316 | 0.28 | 8 min |
| #4 | OTTO | 207 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | MOM-D34D ponglenis007 | 140 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Akaza | 9 9 9 | +4.01 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | OTTO | +2.10 | 77 | 51 |
| #3 | Abelsiini | +1.45 | 67 | 55 |
| #4 | ykkosvaantaja | +1.02 | 72 | 49 |
| #5 | 冰淇淋 | +0.91 | 59 | 63 |





