








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 843 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 568 matches | ||
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 72 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7163 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,946 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6012 | 21% |
| Smokes | 5526 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 9906 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 7502 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,013,278 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1337 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mBizZy | 61% | 41 |
| #2 | Alpha | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | hypz | 57% | 47 |
| #4 | J.S./M0mMo | 54% | 67 |
| #5 | Merkules | 53% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C3SCO | 554 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #2 | Merkules | 411 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #3 | DieHund | 362 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #4 | Grande | 317 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #5 | keda619 | 253 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merkules | +2.65 | 63 | 68 |
| #2 | vassi*APSJ | +2.55 | 79 | 63 |
| #3 | DieHund | +1.24 | 71 | 60 |
| #4 | hypz | +1.16 | 61 | 65 |
| #5 | C3SCO | +1.04 | 59 | 66 |





