








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 360 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2843 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,092 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2490 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2481 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1759 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2362 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $823,185 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | J.S./M0mMo | 55% | 20 |
| #9 | hyrsh | 55% | 40 |
| #10 | C3SCO | 55% | 210 |
| #11 | DieHund | 54% | 104 |
| #12 | G13 | 50% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C3SCO | 16 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | DieHund | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Grande | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | keda619 | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | J.S./M0mMo | 2 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C3SCO | 400 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #2 | DieHund | 373 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | Grande | 329 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #4 | keda619 | 230 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | Merkules | 226 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ratboy | +5.03 | 81 | 72 |
| #2 | vassi*APSJ | +2.32 | 79 | 62 |
| #3 | Merkules | +2.26 | 74 | 68 |
| #4 | C3SCO | +1.28 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | J.S./M0mMo | +1.17 | 76 | 51 |





