








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 229 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
585 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 796 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 123 | 15% |
| Smokes | 237 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 229 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 207 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $216,676 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 77 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skinbeard122 | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | LadySamWitch115 | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | asifc77 | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | ExplorerAlex | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | Help2 | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | LadySamWitch115 | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | asifc77 | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | ExplorerAlex | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | Help2 | 50% | 10 |
| #6 | Sonk Ponkle | 48% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | asifc77 | 6 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | Sonk Ponkle | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | skinbeard122 | 3 | 0.0195 |
| #4 | LadySamWitch115 | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sonk Ponkle | 77 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | ExplorerAlex | 66 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | asifc77 | 62 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Help2 | 15 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | LadySamWitch115 | 7 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Help2 | +4.38 | 54 | 63 |
| #2 | asifc77 | +2.87 | 32 | 33 |
| #3 | LadySamWitch115 | +2.69 | 75 | 31 |
| #4 | ExplorerAlex | +2.42 | 41 | 51 |
| #5 | skinbeard122 | +1.59 | 33 | 34 |





