








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 556 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 576 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7082 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,741 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2170 | 13% |
| Smokes | 6560 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 2948 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5063 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,907,332 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dissa | 49% | 340 |
| #2 | Kalu Malli | 46% | 68 |
| #3 | Hoo Lee Sheet | 46% | 237 |
| #4 | KaWaJaβͺ | 45% | 73 |
| #5 | K@iya { ε―δΊ }πβ | 43% | 374 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 50 π
ππ π©πππ€ | 43 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | K@iya { ε―δΊ }πβ | 41 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Hoo Lee Sheet | 27 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | ZACK | 26 | 0.0139 |
| #5 | Dissa | 24 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 50 π
ππ π©πππ€ | 1226 | 0.19 | 28 min |
| #2 | K@iya { ε―δΊ }πβ | 1001 | 0.13 | 27 min |
| #3 | Dissa | 998 | 0.14 | 28 min |
| #4 | Hoo Lee Sheet | 222 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | ZACK | 216 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dissa | +1.47 | 61 | 57 |
| #2 | ZACK | +1.10 | 60 | 53 |
| #3 | KaWaJaβͺ | +0.50 | 78 | 57 |
| #4 | P@SIYA π£ | +0.12 | 42 | 44 |
| #5 | Hoo Lee Sheet | -0.03 | 59 | 32 |





