










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1370 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 231 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4134 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,554 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2799 | 21% |
| Smokes | 4086 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4252 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2417 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,289,255 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2486 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | munch | 50% | 22 |
| #2 | Formerly Joob | 46% | 35 |
| #3 | laun | 44% | 162 |
| #4 | Sensful | 43% | 54 |
| #5 | General Geralt | 40% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | laun | 44% | 162 |
| #4 | Sensful | 43% | 54 |
| #5 | General Geralt | 40% | 35 |
| #6 | PP | 37% | 139 |
| #7 | (82)M4Y-s3n | 28% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sensful | 26 | 0.0245 |
| #2 | General Geralt | 12 | 0.0180 |
| #3 | laun | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | munch | 4 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | PP | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Formerly Joob | 137 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #2 | munch | 85 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | PP | 76 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | laun | 62 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sensful | 58 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoeyDaddy | +2.98 | 53 | 60 |
| #2 | Formerly Joob | +2.02 | 58 | 50 |
| #3 | Sensful | +1.74 | 95 | 45 |
| #4 | munch | +0.25 | 47 | 48 |
| #5 | PP | -0.90 | 48 | 40 |





