








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 84 matches | ||
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 102 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3848 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,149 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2031 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2441 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1614 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1063 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,412,033 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 967 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | рурга | 56% | 45 |
| #2 | 86 | 51% | 63 |
| #3 | sophisticatedgoose52 | 46% | 56 |
| #4 | Dr. Nutsack (84) | 44% | 171 |
| #5 | stop bunnyhopping iql | 44% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 86 | +7.16 | 85 | 71 |
| #2 | рурга | +5.01 | 79 | 47 |
| #3 | Sensful | +2.77 | 93 | 39 |
| #4 | JoeyDaddy | +2.69 | 66 | 50 |
| #5 | stop bunnyhopping iql | +2.50 | 26 | 53 |





