








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 296 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 100 matches | ||
| Faceit | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3065 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,309 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3274 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2418 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2127 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2490 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $819,512 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 145 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitchell | 70% | 33 |
| #2 | Deathspark | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | flavor | 61% | 51 |
| #4 | 170LBSLEAN | 51% | 43 |
| #5 | butter | 45% | 131 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Deathspark | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | flavor | 61% | 51 |
| #4 | 170LBSLEAN | 51% | 43 |
| #5 | butter | 45% | 131 |
| #6 | KsaR | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flavor | 17 | 0.0173 |
| #2 | butter | 13 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | mitchell | 9 | 0.0130 |
| #4 | 170LBSLEAN | 6 | 0.0069 |
| #5 | Deathspark | 6 | 0.0139 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flavor | 203 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #2 | butter | 168 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | mitchell | 139 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | 170LBSLEAN | 120 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | KsaR | 70 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitchell | +6.08 | 90 | 66 |
| #2 | flavor | +3.54 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | KsaR | +2.33 | 87 | 65 |
| #4 | Deathspark | +1.78 | 56 | 51 |
| #5 | 170LBSLEAN | +1.27 | 64 | 61 |





