








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 87 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Esplay | 11 matches | 1,510 | |
| Competitive Jura | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8193 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,755 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9604 | 36% |
| Smokes | 6647 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6857 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3647 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,684,958 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 496 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𐂃𐂃 | 56% | 152 |
| #2 | daetrip | 49% | 129 |
| #3 | E-grill | 48% | 649 |
| #4 | Theyhey☯ | 45% | 144 |
| #5 | LordEndre^.^ | 45% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𐂃𐂃 | 56% | 152 |
| #2 | daetrip | 49% | 129 |
| #3 | E-grill | 48% | 649 |
| #4 | Theyhey☯ | 45% | 144 |
| #5 | LordEndre^.^ | 45% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𐂃𐂃 | 37 | 0.0120 |
| #2 | E-grill | 16 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | daetrip | 9 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Theyhey☯ | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | LordEndre^.^ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E-grill | 536 | 0.04 | 15 min |
| #2 | LordEndre^.^ | 520 | 0.34 | 12 min |
| #3 | 𐂃𐂃 | 347 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | daetrip | 304 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | Theyhey☯ | 161 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𐂃𐂃 | +2.85 | 90 | 53 |
| #2 | daetrip | +2.82 | 75 | 59 |
| #3 | Sjöö❤ | +1.80 | 62 | 65 |
| #4 | LordEndre^.^ | -0.34 | 52 | 62 |
| #5 | E-grill | -2.72 | 39 | 36 |





