








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 28 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
353 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,020 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 192 | 19% |
| Smokes | 257 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 332 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 239 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $105,639 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KorKross | 47% | 43 |
| #2 | xJaquar | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | Bling2king12 | 41% | 39 |
| #4 | whalebone | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | Subunnah | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KorKross | 47% | 43 |
| #2 | xJaquar | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | Bling2king12 | 41% | 39 |
| #4 | whalebone | 33% | 3 |
| #5 | Subunnah | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bling2king12 | 18 | 0.0207 |
| #2 | KorKross | 4 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | Subunnah | 2 | 0.0098 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KorKross | 114 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | Bling2king12 | 113 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | xJaquar | 65 | 0.25 | 1 min |
| #4 | whalebone | 14 | 0.22 | 0 min |
| #5 | Subunnah | 11 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Subunnah | +3.94 | 90 | 57 |
| #2 | KorKross | +2.93 | 71 | 66 |
| #3 | xJaquar | +0.04 | 60 | 76 |
| #4 | whalebone | -0.33 | 75 | 42 |
| #5 | Bling2king12 | -0.73 | 73 | 41 |





